The Marriage Celebration of Kathryn and Ryan

“Simple Gifts,” Elder Joseph Brackett, Jr.
“Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring,” Johann Sebastian Bach


Opening Prayer
“Wedding Prayer” by Robert Louis Stevenson
Lord, behold our family here assembled.
We thank you for this place in which we dwell,
for the love that unites us,
for the peace accorded us this day,
for the hope with which we expect the morrow,
for the health, the work, the food,
and the bright skies that make our lives delightful;
for our friends in all parts of the earth.

– Celebrant: Kathryn, will you have this man to be your husband; to live together in the covenant of marriage? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?
– Kathryn: I will.
– Celebrant: Ryan, will you have this woman to be your wife; to live together in the covenant of marriage? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?
– Ryan: I will.
– Celebrant: Will all of you witnessing these promises do all in your power to uphold Kathryn and Ryan in their marriage?
– People:  We will.

Presentation of the Bride
– Celebrant: Who gives this woman to marry this man?
– Mother of the bride: She comes of her own accord, with the full support of her father and me.*


“On Marriage,” Khalil Gibran
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love.
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together.
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.

Ruth 1: 16 – 17
And Ruth said, Entreat me not to leave you, or to return from following after you. For where you go, I will go; and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God. / Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord do so to me and more also if anything but death parts me from you.

An excerpt from The Gift, Hafiz
Even after all this time the sun never says to the earth, “You owe me.” Look what happens with a love like that, it lights the whole sky.

Marriage Address

Wedding Vows
(Face each other, hold hands.)
– Ryan: I, Ryan, take you, Kathryn, to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, all the days of my life. This is my solemn vow.
– Kathryn: I, Kathryn, take you, Ryan, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, all the days of my life. This is my solemn vow.

Exchange of Rings
(Let go of hands.)
– Groom: Kathryn, I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you in the name of God.
– Bride: Ryan, I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you in the name of God.

(Celebrant joins the right hands of the couple.)
May the Lord bless you and keep you.
May the Lord make his face to shine upon you.
May God give you grace not to sell yourselves short. Grace to risk something big for something good.
Grace to remember that the world is too dangerous a place
for anything but truth,
And too small for anything but love.
May God take your minds and think through them.
May God take your hands and work through them.
May God take your lips and speak through them.
May God take your hearts and set them on fire.*

Declaration of Marriage
Ryan and Kathryn, with the blessing and support of your families and friends, by the vows you have made to one another, by the strength of your covenant, and in the presence of God, it is my pleasure to pronounce you Husband and Wife. You may kiss your bride.

“The Holly and the Ivy,” Cecil Sharp


*Thank you to Joanna Goddard for inspiring this presentation of the bride, and to Reverend Liz Jones for this blessing.

13 comments posted +add a comment SEE MORE: Full Ceremony, Personal, snippet + ink wedding

Hi friends! Trying to write a post about our has ceremony turned out to be much harder than writing the other posts, probably because it’s talking about the most important part of the day. I find myself with an unfinished post and a date to keep with my three adorable nephews and their mom and grandpa, so I won’t have a chance to share my ceremony post until later today. I’m sure you won’t mind getting a bit of a breather from non-stop “Our Wedding” posts anyway – who knew I had so much to say about our wedding!

Photo by Elizabeth Messina.

Kiss the Groom (Elizabeth Messina) is a sponsor of Snippet & Ink.

4 comments posted +add a comment SEE MORE: Personal, snippet + ink wedding

There were a few reasons that Ryan and I decided to see each other before the ceremony: not only did we want to spend more time with our guests at the reception, we also wanted to take portrait photos before it got dark (and since we were getting married at 5:00 in December, it would certainly be dark by the time the ceremony ended). So after getting ready, Ryan and the rest of the guys met up with the ladies at Cavallo Point. It made for such a stunning backdrop, and the cloudy sky created soft lighting even in the middle of the day. (We were lucky that the rain held off until the next day, when it poured buckets!)

My flats came in handy when we took a few photos off the beaten path! Ryan and I agreed ahead of time that we would check in with each other throughout the day to make sure we both stayed present, so when I started to stress out about getting the bottom of my dress dirty before the ceremony, my sweet groom made sure to bring me back to earth.

I have only one regret from our wedding day, and it’s that Ryan and I didn’t make a shot list for group photos. Even though it was on the to do list that Laurie and Jenna gave to us, and even though Elizabeth asked us to put one together, we just never sat down to do it. With Ryan and me trying to remember what photos we wanted on the spot, the whole thing felt more stressful than it needed to be, and unfortunately it meant that we missed some photos that we would like to have had (one of Ryan and his siblings, one of just the girls and just the guys, one of the entire group together). It’s not the end of the world, and we have countless wonderful photos, but it was a simple thing that would have taken us fifteen minutes if we had done it the week before the wedding (or some time in those 18 months we were engaged). Don’t be like us! Make a shot list ahead of time!

Photos by the always talented Elizabeth Messina.

Kiss the Groom (Elizabeth Messina) and Laurie Arons Special Events are sponsors of Snippet & Ink. Thank you to Cavallo Point for extending the media room rate for our stay.

20 comments posted +add a comment SEE MORE: Personal, Real Weddings, snippet + ink wedding

Michaele Thunen (my godmother) made our sweet little ring pillow with beaded fabric and tied with a red velvet ribbon. Our wedding bands came from Stephan-Hill, a local jeweler that my mom has used for years. I went with a very simple yellow gold band, and Ryan chose a white gold band with a scratch finish. These silly little books were just too funny to pass up.

Last week I talked about the beautiful bouquet that Michaele made for me to carry. She also made the attendant bouquets using white flowers (ranunculus, paper whites, cyclamen) and dusty miller, as well as the flower girl cone (with just the perfect amount of red ribbon) and head wreath.

Many of our guests traveled from out of town to celebrate with us, and we wanted to greet them with something fun and useful, so we had welcome bags waiting for them at their hotels.

For the graphics on the bags themselves, I made a little collage of silhouettes that had to do with Ryan and me and our relationship: golf ball, laptop, the states we’ve lived in, a moving truck, a wedding cake. Jill Sassa screen printed the design onto small canvas tote bags purchased from Bagworks. She also designed and printed little name tags and welcome booklets that included an itinerary for the weekend, as well as some of Ryan and my favorite restaurants and things to do in San Francisco.

In addition to the welcome booklet, bags included:
Locally made Beth’s Heavenly Little Chocolate Chip Cookies.
Crunchy corn from Sensible Foods for a healthier snack.
Calistoga sparkling water.
Vintage postcards from the Presidio Social Club, tied with twine to recall our save-the-dates.
A glassine bag filled with travel-sized necessities (Kleenex, Advil, toothpaste, Shout wipes, and Tums).
A set of California-themed pencils from Paper Pastries – each pencil was a different color, stamped with a different California fact, like the state bird, state motto, etc.

Photos by Elizabeth Messina.

Kiss the Groom (Elizabeth Messina), Paper Pastries and PS Paper are sponsors of Snippet & Ink. Thank you to my wonderful godmother, Michaele Thunen, for the gift of our personal flowers and the darling ring pillow.

9 comments posted +add a comment SEE MORE: Personal, Real Weddings, snippet + ink wedding

Last week I shared some of the inspiration for our wedding stationery; here is the resulting invitation suite…

White paper with gray ink and red accents were an obvious choice for the wedding we were planning, and they fit with my goal of an invitation suite that was both playful and sophisticated. I started to play around in Photoshop with fonts and motifs, and came up with a design for the invitation, reception card coaster, and reply card. With the help of Laurie Arons (our planner) and Jill Sassa (PS Paper), we finalized the details (exact colors, paper weight, text spacing, etc.), and Jill executed the design perfectly.


The couple times I’ve received mail from calligrapher Betsy Dunlap, it’s always felt like a little gift – I wanted our guests to have that same experience when they received our invitations. Betsy’s whimsical calligraphy (we chose her Sofia style) combined with vintage stamps from The Paper Nickel added just the right amount of fun and color to our envelopes.

For our save-the-dates, Jill found the perfect vintage postcards of a cable car and the Golden Gate Bridge, and added the tiniest bit of glitter to make them extra special. One card was printed with a hand-written note asking guests to save the date, and the other was printed with hotel and travel information. The two cards were tied together with bakers twine, finished off with a custom tag, then mailed in glassine envelopes with a wrap-around address label. (You can see a pic with all of those save-the-date details on the PS Paper blog.)


We used traditional wording on our invitations, printing just our first names in red for a little playfulness. A simple wreath motif was printed without ink (also called a blind press) at the top of the invite.


Laurie suggested a coaster for our reception card, and I immediately agreed that would be a perfect touch for our supper club reception. The coaster and RSVP card also included the blind press wreath. Once all of the designs were finalized, Jill gave the paper rounded corners, had all of the pieces hand-edged in red, and all of the envelopes hand-bordered to match, then brought them to Alan Hillesheim Letterpress for printing. All I can say is that I wish you could touch our invitations – I just love the texture of letterpress, especially when it’s printed on extra thick paper.

For anyone who might be curious, the fonts used in our invitations are ITC Bodoni Seventy-Two and Chopin Script. The paper was extra thick Crane Lettra 100% cotton in Pearl White.

Photos by Elizabeth Messina.



Kiss the Groom (Elizabeth Messina), Laurie Arons Special Events, The Paper Nickel and PS Paper are sponsors of Snippet & Ink. Thank you to Betsy Dunlap for the wedding gift of envelope calligraphy.

24 comments posted +add a comment SEE MORE: Personal, Real Weddings, snippet + ink wedding