With all of our focus on how to make your wedding special, we thought it was time to highlight some ways to make your marriage awesome, too. Introducing “Snapshot of a Marriage,” a new series from contributor Emily Westbrooks, who interviews couples on some of their secrets for a strong and successful marriage.
Just a few months after Adam and Paulina met, Adam was deployed to Bosnia. When he returned, they married, moved from Florida to Maine, and Adam started law school. Five years later he was deployed again to Iraq for a year, where he was just missed by a suicide bomber. And where he did miss the birth of his first child.
“When Adam returned from Iraq, we decided to go to couples counseling because we were having a hard time communicating – it was the best decision we ever made,” Paulina told me.
Now after adding four more children to the family (making up the Fab Five, as they call their gang), Adam and Paulina still carve out time for each other. No kids, phones, television or other distractions. Whether it’s occasional short trips, date nights or simply a few minutes in the morning or evening to talk, it’s an important part of their relationship. “The kids have learned to respect that time as ours,” says Paulina, “because we have made each other a priority.”
And advice for newly-weds? Paulina shared, “Love is a choice. All the thoughtful, sweet, selfless things that you do and receive while dating and during the honeymoon stage are not a given. You both chose to be that way and you have to continue to choose to do those things.”
Photo by Lauren Bodwell.