Children in a wedding party get photographed almost as much as the bride, usually mid-twirl and rarely standing still. I treat their hair as a small engineering problem: it has to stay up through running, hugging and a nap in the car, and it can’t pinch, or it won’t last until the vows. A wiggly three-year-old and a poised junior bridesmaid need very different things, so the ideas below run from quick toddler styles to proper updos for older girls. Each one is something a parent can practise at home or bring to a stylist, with honest notes on how long it holds.
Adapting These Styles for Bobs, Coils and Baby-Fine Toddler Hair
Most of the styles below are shown on long, smooth hair. Real flower girls have chin-length bobs, tight coils and wispy toddler fluff, and each needs a small change.
Short bobs
Anything that needs a ponytail is out, but a braid along the hairline into a clip, a headband, or two tiny front twists all work. I add a small flower clip at the end of each section so short ends don’t poke out.
Coily and tightly curled hair
Style it on stretched, well-moisturised hair, and plan protective styles like cornrows or a puff a day or two ahead. Skip the curling wand completely. A satin scarf at bedtime the night before keeps the shape.
Baby-fine toddler hair
There often isn’t enough to pin. A single small bow clip, a tiny top knot with a soft elastic, or a floral headband looks sweeter than any attempt at an updo, and she’s far less likely to pull it out.
1. Half-Up Curls With Flower Crown
Of all the requests I get for flower girls, this one comes first. The top section is drawn back and the rest falls in curls, with a small crown sitting on top. I anchor the crown to the half-up section with two pins on each side, otherwise it slides back the moment she runs. Silk blooms or dried baby’s breath outlast fresh ones in warm hair. Nothing here pulls tight, so even sensitive-headed children tolerate it, and it suits garden and boho weddings.
2. Classic Low Bun With Ribbon
Quietly practical. A smooth low bun at the nape with a satin ribbon round it in the wedding colours sits below the chair back, so she can lean back without squashing it. I brush the hair into the ponytail with a damp bristle brush to get rid of bumps before twisting. A few loose tendrils at the face keep it young. Formal and vintage weddings suit it, and it lasts through a long reception.
3. French Braid Crown
A braid running all the way round the head like a halo is about as secure as children’s hair gets. I start at one side behind the ear and work a French braid around the hairline, finishing where I began and tucking the tail underneath. On medium to long hair it handles wind and play without budging. Tiny flowers or pearl pins add a little detail. If her hair is layered, short pieces will poke out of the braid; a little styling cream on the fingers keeps them in.
4. Soft Waves With Side Part
Waves with a clean side part are for the child who won’t sit for an updo. I bend the hair with a wand on a low setting, let it cool, then brush through for soft movement. A small jewelled barrette near the part adds sparkle. Fine hair loses waves quickly, so a light texturising spray before curling helps them hold. It works with modern or classic themes and takes very little sitting time.
5. Double Dutch Braids
For a flower girl who will sprint the moment the photos end, double Dutch braids are my first suggestion. They run along each side close to the scalp and lock every strand in place. Ribbons or floral clips at the ends add a festive finish. They’re my go-to for beach and windy outdoor weddings, where loose styles end up in the face. Don’t braid too tight at the temples; a child with a sore hairline will scratch at it all day.
6. Curly Updo With Baby’s Breath
Naturally curly or coily hair makes the fullest updos. I gather the curls high, keeping their volume, and tuck small sprigs of baby’s breath throughout. Work with the curl, not against it: I detangle only with conditioner and fingers, and pin with large U-pins that slide into curls rather than flat bobby pins that crush them. It keeps hair off the neck at a warm-weather wedding and holds through all the twirling.
7. Bubble Ponytail
Children ask for the bubble ponytail by name. It’s a ponytail sectioned with small elastics down its length, each section gently puffed out. Thin ribbons over the elastics make it look dressier. On very straight, silky hair the bubbles can collapse, so I pancake each one a little wider and set it with a touch of spray. It suits straight or wavy hair and energetic kids at casual or garden weddings.
8. Braided Half-Up With Curls
Two small braids from the front, pulled back and joined, with curls below. Three-strand braids are quickest; fishtails add detail on older girls. I hide the join with a flower clip or pearl pin. This is a good one for medium to long hair at almost any wedding, and it’s comfortable enough that children forget they’re wearing it.
9. Top Knot With Floral Pins
A top knot keeps hair completely off the face and neck, which matters at a hot outdoor wedding. I sweep everything up to the crown, twist it into a rounded knot and pin it. Thick hair makes a big knot that can feel heavy; I split it in two and wrap one half round the other so it stays compact. Fine hair needs the opposite, a little backcombing at the base. Small floral pins round the knot finish it.
10. Fishtail Braid To The Side
Fishtails look like herringbone and are far simpler than they appear. I sweep the hair to one side, braid it and loosen it slightly for a relaxed shape, sometimes weaving a thin ribbon through. It needs longer hair, ideally below the shoulders, or the braid ends before the pattern shows. Junior bridesmaids tend to love it because it feels grown-up. It suits rustic and outdoor weddings.
11. Loose Curls With Headband
Curls left down with a pretty headband is the quickest polished look I know. Gentle curls, then a jewelled, floral or ribbon headband slides on to keep the front back. Headbands with teeth on the underside grip much better on slippery hair than smooth satin ones, and they hurt less than tight elastic bands behind the ears. It works on almost any length and suits active kids.
12. Twisted Halo Updo
Twisting instead of braiding gives a softer halo with less tension on the scalp, which is why I use it for children with sensitive heads. I twist sections from each side and wrap them around the head, pinning as I go. Small flowers or pearls finish it. Twists loosen faster than braids, so I always twist toward the face first, then turn back. It suits medium to long hair, formal or whimsical.
13. Pigtail Buns
Pigtail buns, also called space buns, are irresistible on younger flower girls. A centre part, two twisted buns, a ribbon or floral clip on each. I make sure both buns sit at the same height by checking in a mirror from the front; uneven buns are the first thing you notice in photos. They keep hair off the face for active toddlers and hold on most textures.
14. Side Braid With Curls
Sweep everything to one side, braid the top portion loosely, let curls fall below: it’s softer than a full side braid. I loosen the braid with my fingertips once it’s tied. Delicate flowers or a thin ribbon add charm. It suits medium to long hair at rustic or outdoor weddings. Because all the weight sits on one side, I put a hidden pin behind the opposite ear to stop the whole style sliding over.
15. Crown Braid With Flowers
The milkmaid braid uses two braids wrapped over the head to form a halo, rather than one braid worked round the hairline. Two plaits, one pinned forward over the top, the other tucked behind it. It needs hair long enough to reach over the crown from the nape, so check before you promise it. Fresh or silk flowers tucked along the braid suit boho, rustic and garden themes, and it barely moves in wind.
16. Sleek High Ponytail With Curls
High, sleek and curled at the ends, this ponytail suits a warm day and a modern wedding. I smooth the hair up to the crown, secure it, curl the length and wrap a strand round the base to hide the elastic. A ribbon or floral clip adds a festive touch. Sleek styles show every flyaway in flash photos, so I finish with a tiny amount of smoothing cream on a toothbrush along the hairline.
17. Half-Up Bun With Bow
The top section goes into a small bun and the rest stays down, with a bow at the base. It’s quick and works on straight, wavy and curly hair, which makes it a sensible choice when several flower girls with different hair need to match. Use the same bow on every child and the group looks coordinated even if the textures differ.
18. Braided Ponytail
A braided ponytail combines a braid’s security with a ponytail’s swing, high or low. I braid the full length and weave ribbon or small flowers in. It works on most hair textures and holds from ceremony to reception. Junior bridesmaids who don’t want to look ‘little’ often choose it. A low version is more comfortable if she’ll be sitting against a chair back for a long service.
19. Loose Updo With Tendrils
A loose updo with a few tendrils at the cheeks looks soft and slightly undone. I gather the hair into a relaxed knot or twist, pin it and draw out a few wispy pieces. The trick with children is keeping the tendrils short; long ones end up in her mouth and food. Pearl pins or tiny flowers add detail. It suits formal or vintage weddings and medium to long hair.
20. Twisted Half-Up Style
Two sections from each side, twisted back and secured together at the crown: it’s quicker than braiding and gentle on the scalp. A flower clip or pearl pin covers the join. It works on straight, wavy and curly hair and suits almost every theme. Twisted sections loosen slowly through the day, so I set a small clear elastic under the clip as a backup.
21. Messy Bun With Baby’s Breath
The messy bun is the most forgiving style on this list. I gather the hair into a loose textured knot, let a few pieces fall, and tuck sprigs of baby’s breath through it. As it loosens during play, it just looks more relaxed rather than ruined. It keeps hair off the neck on a warm day and suits boho and rustic weddings. On very fine hair, a little dry shampoo first gives it body.
22. Cornrows With Beads
Cornrows with beads are secure and protective for flower girls with textured hair. The braids lie close to the scalp and can be laid in straight rows, curves or patterns that finish in a ponytail or bun, with beads or small floral accents at the ends. I always keep the tension gentle, particularly at the edges, and oil the scalp lightly afterwards. Done a day or two before, they’re settled and comfortable by the wedding.
23. Half-Up Braided Crown
Braid one section from each side, join them at the back, leave the rest down: a half-up crown gives the halo effect without pinning everything up. Curls or waves below look soft. Tiny flowers tucked into the braids suit almost any wedding. It works on medium to long hair and keeps strands off her face all day.
24. Curly Afro Puff With Headband
An afro puff is my favourite way to celebrate coily hair at a wedding. I gather the curls high into a round puff with a soft scrunchie or a stretchy fabric band, never a thin rubber elastic, which snaps and breaks coily strands. A floral or jewelled headband in front keeps the edges smooth. It’s comfortable, secure and suits casual, garden or formal weddings.
25. Flower-Adorned Chignon
A chignon is a low, rolled knot at the nape: smooth, formal and a little grown-up, which is why junior bridesmaids tend to choose it. I roll the hair under and pin it, then add fresh or silk flowers. It needs medium to long hair. A few soft tendrils at the face keep it age-appropriate. The low placement means it stays comfortable through a long ceremony.
26. Waterfall Braid
A waterfall braid runs horizontally across the back of the head and lets strands drop through as it goes, so they fall like a stream. It needs medium to long hair with a bit of wave, because dead-straight hair makes the dropped pieces look stringy. I curl those strands lightly afterwards. Tiny flowers or pearl pins add detail. It suits boho, garden and rustic weddings.
27. Twin Braids With Ribbons
Twin braids tied with ribbons are classic for the youngest flower girls. A centre part, two neat plaits, satin ribbons in the wedding colours. They’re the most secure option for a toddler and work on most textures. On very short toddler hair, I start the braids higher and closer to the head so there’s enough length to reach the ribbon.
28. Curls With Jeweled Hairpins
Curls left down with a few jewelled pins scattered through give sparkle without an updo. I curl the hair gently and slide rhinestone or pearl pins in at different heights. The pins catch the light in photos, but they also slide out of fine hair, so I anchor each one over a tiny hidden bobby pin. It suits formal or glamorous weddings and takes little sitting time.
29. Low Side Bun With Flowers
Roll the hair into a low knot just behind one ear, then dress it with fresh or silk flowers. The off-centre bun looks a little whimsical and suits boho, garden and formal themes. Make sure it sits on the side away from the bride when the flower girl stands at the altar, so it shows in the ceremony photos. A few loose tendrils near the face soften it.
30. Half-Up Ponytail With Curls
A half-up ponytail with curled ends is practical and pretty. I gather the top section into a ponytail, curl all the hair, then wrap a strand round the elastic to hide it and add a ribbon or floral clip. It keeps hair off the face while the length moves freely below. It works on most textures and suits modern and classic weddings alike.
What the Camera Sees When She Walks Down the Aisle
Guests watch a flower girl from the front, but many of the best photos catch her from behind or the side: walking ahead of the bride, standing at the altar, sitting on a step. I always check a style from the back in a hand mirror, because that’s where elastics show, partings wander and pins glint.
Group photos raise a different issue. If several children stand together, matching accessories make them look like a set even when their hairstyles differ. Bright flash also picks up every frizzy strand around the hairline, so a tiny dab of smoothing cream along the edges just before the ceremony is worth more than a full can of spray. Finally, keep flowers small; a big crown on a little head throws a shadow across her face in midday sun.
Talk to the photographer about timing too. If the formal portraits of the children happen early, before the ceremony, they’ll show the style at its freshest. Left until after dinner, you’re photographing whatever survived the dance floor, and a quick re-pin by a parent five minutes beforehand makes all the difference.
Let Her Choose the Ribbon
Styling a child for a wedding is simpler than it looks once you put comfort first. Braided crowns, curls, bubble ponytails and flower-filled updos all have a place, and the right one depends on her age, her hair and how long she’ll sit for. Watch for tight elastics and pokey accessories, because she’ll pull out anything that hurts. Pick a style she’ll actually keep in, try it once before the day, and let her pick the ribbon.
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