Styling a child for a wedding is a different job from styling a bride. She’ll walk the aisle, sit for photos, eat, dance and probably roll on the floor at some point, and she’ll tell you the second something pulls. So the updos I do for flower girls and junior bridesmaids are softer and more forgiving than adult ones, with hold coming from smart sectioning rather than tension. Buns, braids, twisted crowns, curly puffs, ribbons and tiny flowers all have a place below. Match the style to her hair texture, her age and how long she’ll actually sit still.
A Wriggly Five-Year-Old and a Hairbrush
The style matters less than the twenty minutes around it. Children don’t fidget because they’re naughty; they fidget because the brush hurts and nothing is happening. I plan for that.
- Wash and condition her hair the night before, then braid it loosely to sleep. It detangles faster in the morning and holds pins better than freshly washed hair.
- Put her in the chair after she’s eaten and before she’s in the dress. Hungry children don’t sit, and a clean dress shouldn’t be under a styling cape.
- Detangle from the ends up with a wide-tooth comb and a little leave-in conditioner. Starting at the roots is what makes children cry.
- Give her something to hold or watch. A tablet with one short episode works better than any number of promises.
- Pick the simplest version of the style you can live with. If she starts pulling at it in the first hour, she’ll keep pulling all day.
If she’s very young or very anxious, have the person she trusts most do the brushing while the stylist does the pinning.
1. Kids Wedding Ballerina Bun
A kids wedding ballerina bun is the cleanest updo I know for a formal ceremony, and it lifts every strand off a hot neck. Medium to long hair suits it; for finer hair, a small bun donut in her hair colour adds fullness. I set it a little lower than a dance-class bun, because a high, tight one gives young children headaches within the hour. A light mist of flexible spray and a satin bow or pearl pin is all the finish it needs.
2. Kids Wedding Low Side Bun
Tucked near one side of the nape, a low side bun has a storybook shape that sits well with full flower girl skirts. It’s my choice for children who hate tight styles, since I can gather the hair loosely and pin it in small sections that share the load. Loose curls at the face, a side part or a tiny floral clip above the bun all suit it. Both the front and back read well, which helps during the aisle walk and family portraits.
3. Kids Wedding Braided Bun
Thick hair goes wild in a plain bun by mid-afternoon. A braid wrapped around the bun, run through the crown or started as a French braid controls that volume without flattening it, and on fine hair it adds texture that the camera picks up. A narrow ribbon matched to the dress, or a few small pearl pins, finishes it. Keep the braid relaxed. A child’s scalp is more sensitive than an adult’s, and a tight braid on a five-year-old will be pulled out by the reception.
4. Kids Wedding Crown Braid Updo
A crown braid wraps around the head like a halo and keeps every bit of hair off the face, which is exactly what you want while she’s tossing petals. I tuck and pin the ends so it stays lifted. It’s a natural fit for garden and rustic venues and classic flower girl looks. Straight, wavy and curly hair all work, though textured hair needs a leave-in conditioner first so it braids without snapping. Tiny flowers or baby’s breath can be tucked into it. Braid it slightly loose so it reads soft, not severe.
5. Kids Wedding Twisted Bun
Twisting is gentler than braiding, and quicker for a child who won’t sit long. I twist small sections back from the hairline and pin them into a bun at the nape or crown, which gives more shape than a plain bun. Fine or slippery hair holds better twisted than braided, especially if I lock each twist with a clear elastic before pinning. A small satin bow or a delicate floral barrette finishes it without crowding a small face.
6. Kids Wedding Curly Bun
Brushing curls smooth is the fastest way to frizz on a curly child, so I don’t. I gather the curls with my fingers and pin them into a rounded bun, keeping the texture full and bouncy. Curl cream with a touch of gel tames frizz without leaving the hair crunchy, and soft pins are kinder than hard grips. A few curls can fall at the face. Small flowers, pearls or a slim headband dress it up.
7. Kids Wedding Double Bun Updo
Two buns feel playful and still polished. A kids wedding double bun updo can sit low at the nape, high near the crown or just behind the ears. Younger flower girls tend to love it, and parents like it because the hair is split in two, so each bun is lighter and less likely to drag. Thick hair is easier to manage this way too. Keep the buns smooth for a formal wedding or pull them apart a little for a relaxed one, and add matching bows or tiny floral clips.
8. Kids Wedding Half Crown Bun
This one combines a braided or twisted crown with a small bun at the back, so the hair is fully lifted but still delicate around the face. The crown detail frames her features while the bun keeps everything secure through the ceremony and reception. Shoulder-length to long hair works. Sleek suits a formal venue, slightly loose an outdoor one. If you’d like it to tie in with the bouquet, a few tiny flower pins along the crown do that.
9. Kids Wedding Fishtail Bun
Older kids and junior bridesmaids usually want something more grown-up, and the fishtail bun gives them that. The fishtail can start at the side, wrap toward the back and tuck into a low bun. Fishtails loosen with movement, so I lock the end with a small elastic and pin the braid into the bun at several points, then gently widen it for texture. A simple clip, ribbon or tiny pearl pins keeps the braid as the main feature. I’d skip it for under-sevens, who rarely sit through the braiding.
10. Kids Wedding Top Knot Bun
Simple, quick and easy to keep in place. The kids wedding top knot bun sits high, which suits dresses with detailed collars, bows or lace backs because nothing covers them. I brush the sides smooth, twist the hair into a rounded bun and pin it, keeping it soft rather than scraped. A small bow at the base makes it playful. It suits straight, wavy and fine hair best; very thick hair makes a top knot heavy enough to tip forward.
11. Kids Wedding Puff Bun
Natural curls, coils and textured hair look their best in a puff bun, gathered into one soft puff and shaped into a rounded bun at the crown or back of the head. Moisture is the prep: a leave-in conditioner and a gentle styling cream, applied the night before or that morning. Don’t pull the edges tight. Young hairlines are fragile, and repeated tension there can cause lasting thinning. Small flowers, gold cuffs or pearl pins around the bun add the festive touch, and it stays comfortable all day.
12. Kids Wedding French Braid Bun
For a long ceremony and a busy reception, the French braid bun is the most secure option on this list. The braid starts at the hairline and runs to the back, where the remaining length tucks into a bun, and it holds without much product. Layered hair is where it really helps, because the braid catches short pieces that would escape a loose updo. Braid it centred, side-parted or on a diagonal for a softer line. Weave a ribbon through if the wedding colours call for it.
13. Kids Wedding Messy Bun
Soft and intentional, never rushed: that’s the difference between a messy bun for a wedding and one for school. I loosely gather, twist and pin the hair, leaving a few soft pieces around the face. Wavy hair suits it because the natural movement adds charm. It fits outdoor, beach, barn or garden weddings. Keep the bun small so it still looks right on a child, dress it with a few flower pins or a delicate bow, and use flexible hold only so she can move without feeling stiff.
14. Kids Wedding Ribbon Bun
When the dress is plain, a ribbon gives it one sweet detail and ties her into the wedding colours. The bun underneath can be low, high or braided, finished with satin, velvet or organza. Lightweight ribbon matters, since a heavy velvet bow drags a small bun sideways. Ivory, blush, dusty blue and champagne are common choices. This is also the easiest style to repeat across several children, so if you have three flower girls of different ages, it’s the one I’d suggest.
15. Kids Wedding Floral Bun
Few updos for flower girls feel as wedding-specific as a floral bun. I gather the hair into a bun and set small fresh or faux flowers around the base, with baby’s breath, tiny roses, daisies or soft greenery matched to the wedding flowers. Keep each piece small so nothing feels heavy or hides her face. It works on low, side, curly and braided buns. For outdoor weddings, faux flowers are often the better call, because fresh ones wilt in sun and children tend to pick at them.
Pins, Elastics and What Stays Out of a Child’s Hair
Adult wedding kits aren’t built for small heads. Here’s what I swap or leave out when I style children:
- Snag-free elastics instead of rubber bands, which tear hair when they come out.
- Fewer, well-placed pins. Toddlers pull things out of their hair and put them in their mouths, so count what goes in and what comes out.
- No floral wire with sharp ends near the scalp. Fresh flowers go on pins or are wrapped with florist tape.
- Light hairspray only, sprayed with her eyes covered by a hand or card.
- Hot tools only if she’s old enough to sit still, and only on low heat. Rag curls or braids overnight do the job for younger children.
At bedtime, take everything out gently with her sitting down, a little conditioner on any knots. If her scalp is red or sore where the style sat, the next updo she wears should be looser.
Comfort Beats Polish for Small Guests
A child’s wedding updo has to last from the first photo to the last dance without her noticing it. Length, texture, age and how sensitive her scalp is decide the style more than the dress does. Sleek buns feel formal, braided updos stay secure, curly buns celebrate natural texture, and ribbons or flowers make any of them feel like a wedding. Try the style once before the day, especially if she dislikes pins. Keep accessories light, never pull tight, and choose flexible hold over stiff products so she can enjoy the party.
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