Mothers of the bride are usually the first in my chair after the bride and the last to complain, so I make a point of asking what she actually likes wearing. She’ll be hugged by every guest, photographed beside her daughter in dozens of formal shots and on her feet for twelve hours. Her hair has to frame her face, suit the formality of her outfit and stay put without feeling stiff. An updo keeps the neckline and earrings visible and copes with a long day better than hair worn down. The mother of the bride updo hairstyles below cover every length and texture, including fine, short and silver hair.
Silver, Blended or Freshly Colored: Timing Your Hair Before the Wedding
A mother of the bride is in nearly as many close-up photos as the bride, and roots and brassy tones show in every one. Timing makes all the difference.
- Book color about one to two weeks before the wedding. That gives fresh color time to soften and rinse slightly, while roots are still barely visible.
- Don’t try a new shade or a big change in that last month. If you want something different, test it two or three months out.
- Silver and white hair can turn yellow from hard water, sun and styling heat. A purple shampoo used once or twice in the final week, or a toning gloss at the salon, brightens it.
- Get a trim three or four weeks before, not the week of. Fresh blunt ends are harder to pin smoothly.
Silver hair also reflects flash more than darker hair, so I use a lighter hand with shine spray and keep the finish soft rather than glossy.
1. Mother Of The Bride Low Chignon
Of all the updo hairstyles for the mother of the bride, a low chignon is the one I suggest most. It rests softly at the nape and suits gowns, jackets, wrap dresses and open necklines equally well. Medium to long hair works best, with a little backcombing at the crown so the top doesn’t sit flat. For fine hair, a small bun padding or a few clip-in pieces add fullness without anyone noticing. A side part and two loose pieces at the temples keep it from looking strict.
2. Mother Of The Bride Twisted Bun
Twists add movement to a bun and make it look fuller than the hair really is. The sides are twisted back loosely and pinned into a low or mid-height bun, which gives the style detail from every angle. Highlighted, gray-blended and dimensional hair look especially good this way, because each twist turns the hair over and shows another tone. I finish with a flexible-hold spray so the shape stays put but still moves, and leave a couple of pieces at the temples.
3. Mother Of The Bride French Twist
For a black-tie wedding or a very formal ceremony, I go to the French twist. Swept upward into a vertical roll, it gives the profile a lifted line. It’s also a clever choice for medium-length hair, since the ends tuck into the roll and the result looks like a full updo. Smooth and sculpted reads formal; a little extra crown volume softens it. Pearl pins, a crystal comb or a plain metallic clip are enough decoration, and keep the attention where it belongs.
4. Mother Of The Bride Messy Low Bun
Layered hair is hard to put up neatly, and a messy low bun is the forgiving answer. The short layers blend into the texture instead of springing out of a smooth surface. I wave the hair first, then pin each section loosely over a firm base. Outdoor, rustic and garden weddings suit it, and so does warm weather. The front should stay soft and lifted; scraping it back is what makes this style look like an everyday bun.
5. Mother Of The Bride Curly Updo
Curly and coily hair makes a mother of the bride updo look full without any backcombing, provided the shape follows the curl pattern instead of brushing it flat. I gather the curls into a soft bun or pinned crown, leaving definition visible. Moisture is the starting point: deep conditioning the week before, curl cream on damp hair, then a strong but flexible setting spray. A side part, a few tendrils or some pinned curls near the crown finish it, and it’s one of the most joyful shapes on this list.
6. Mother Of The Bride Braided Updo
Braids can look young if they’re tight and sporty, and grown-up when they’re soft. Worked along one side, across the crown or wrapped into the bun, a loosened braid adds detail without fuss. Thick hair benefits most, because braiding takes out bulk. Highlights and balayage show up in the pattern. I widen each loop with my fingertips and finish with a low bun, which keeps the overall shape classic.
7. Mother Of The Bride Side Bun
A side bun pairs naturally with a side part or a swept fringe, and it puts some softness beside the face. It sits low behind one ear and looks good from the front and the side. Asymmetric necklines, one-shoulder dresses and delicate shoulder details match it. Placement is the thing to get right: too far forward and it brushes the collar or the shoulder every time she turns her head. Sleek for a formal day, textured for a garden; a couple of subtle pins add sparkle if the outfit needs it.
8. Mother Of The Bride Updo With Bangs
If she has worn a fringe for years, it should stay. Whether the bangs are side-swept, curtain-style or lightly feathered, the rest of the hair can go into a low bun, a chignon or a twist. Bangs frame the eyes and cheekbones while the updo supplies structure, and many women feel less exposed with something at the face. I blend the bangs into the side sections so they look connected, and use a light spray rather than a strong one, so they still move.
9. Mother Of The Bride Updo For Short Hair
Bob-length hair can still go up. I curl it first, then tuck and pin the back in small sections, which gives the impression of a fuller updo. Short layers at the nape are the tricky part; they escape by mid-afternoon unless I pin them flat with mini pins, crossed in pairs. Soft height at the crown and a few face-framing pieces help a lot. Decorative pins are useful here, since they hold short pieces while looking like jewelry. It ends up neat and surprisingly full.
10. Mother Of The Bride Updo For Thin Hair
Hair often thins at the crown and part line with age, and a slick style is unkind to that. A low textured bun, a tucked chignon or a twisted updo all look fuller. Root lift, a little backcombing and hidden pins give the crown support. Clip-in pieces around the bun add density if she wants it; they’re small, light and easy to hide. Soft waves and airy texture hide the scalp in flash photos far better than smoothness does. It should still hold through the dancing.
11. Mother Of The Bride Updo For Long Hair
Long hair worn down gets heavy and hot over a long day, which is often why mothers with long hair ask me for an updo in the first place. A gathered low bun, a braided chignon or a twisted knot keeps all that length in check while showing off its volume. Curling it before pinning gives the shape more depth. With an open back or a detailed neckline, lifting the hair lets those details show. A few face-framing pieces stop it looking too formal.
12. Mother Of The Bride Updo With Pearls
Pearls add occasion without flash. A few pearl pins, a pearl comb or a fine pearl vine can be tucked into a chignon, a bun or a twist. They suit classic dresses, lace, satin and soft neutral colors. I keep the hair underneath clean, because pearls disappear against heavy texture. A low bun or smooth chignon is the best base, with the pearls placed slightly off-center or following the curve of the bun rather than lined up in a row.
13. Mother Of The Bride Updo With Flowers
Flowers are a natural fit for garden weddings, outdoor ceremonies and spring dates. Keep them small and coordinated with the outfit or the wedding palette, so they don’t compete with the bride’s. Fresh baby’s breath, tiny blooms or realistic floral pins tuck well into a textured bun or loose chignon. Gentle waves suit flowers better than a tight formal finish. I’d ask the florist for a few spare stems, wired and kept cool, so they can be added at the very last minute.
14. Mother Of The Bride Sleek Updo
Smooth, controlled hair looks sharp with modern gowns, tailored suits, high necklines and statement earrings. The hair is brushed back into a low bun, twist or knot with almost no loose pieces. In humid weather a sleek style with good product can actually hold better than loose curls, though flyaways will show. Center parts look modern; side parts look softer and more classic. Shine and secure pinning do the rest. It reads confident in both candid and posed photos.
15. Mother Of The Bride Half Updo
Not every mother wants all of her hair up. A half updo lifts and pins the top and side sections, while the rest falls in soft waves or curls. It’s less formal than a full bun but still polished enough for the occasion. Medium and long hair suits it, particularly with a simple neckline. It can also make fine hair look fuller, as the loose lengths move. The downside is heat; on a summer day the hair on her neck gets warm, so I’d keep it for cooler weddings. A small twist, braid or comb at the back finishes it.
Glasses, Hearing Aids and Hats Under an Updo
These are the details mothers often forget to mention until the trial, and they change how I build the style. Bring all of them with you.
Glasses
The arms of your frames run straight through the area where I’d normally pin the sides. I put the glasses on before I finish so I can place pins above and below the arms, and I avoid pulling hair tightly over the ears, which becomes painful within an hour.
Hearing aids
Behind-the-ear aids need a little space, and stiff sprayed pieces rubbing against the microphone can be distracting. I either sweep the hair cleanly behind the device or leave a soft section to cover it, depending on your preference, and keep spray away from it.
Hats and fascinators
A hat changes everything. It needs a low updo, usually at the nape and slightly to the opposite side, so the brim sits level. Fascinators clip or comb into the hair, so they need a firm braided or pinned section underneath. I’ll fit the headpiece during the trial, not on the morning.
An Updo That Lasts Through Every Hug in the Receiving Line
Think about the dress neckline, hair length, texture and the weather, and how much softness she likes at her face. A low chignon is classic, a twisted bun adds fullness, a curly updo celebrates texture and a sleek updo looks modern. Bring photos to your stylist, but stay open to small adjustments that suit your hair better. Above all, the style should still feel like you when you look at the family photos years from now.
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